“We’ve received a complaint. I’m sorry, I can’t say from whom, apparently one of your coworkers overheard a conversation between you and your teammate, Joanna. In the context we received the complaint, you were discussing her date from the previous night, and you made the remark, “there are plenty of fish in the sea.” You’re not in trouble. We just ask that you think a little bit more next time and use more inclusive language. Instead of that, why couldn’t you say something like, “there are plenty of others out there.” When you say something like “fish in the sea” you are, maybe unwittingly, invoking the legacy of fishing, and that can make some people feel unwelcome. We just want everyone who works here to feel comfortable in their own scales or skin, as the case may be.”
After the first two vignettes I was going to write, "Cthulhu would be proud" but then I saw you were going explicitly down that path.
Anyhow, it hits a nerve today because I have, just today, become aware of a potential missed objective related to, shall we say, my corporate duty to the Old Ones. This can likely be rectified by investing about 4 hours to watch/read Thalassian-themed videos and articles, which will suffice if there really are no more seats available in the popular course on Checking Ones Humanist Biases.
Meanwhile, not a single Thalassian works at the company.
~
"How are we ever going to attract that kind of talent with you using this sort of language in the workplace?
I knew a heavily-oceanated person that just finished in the top half of their coding boot camp. When I asked where they were looking and whether they'd consider us, they said no way they'd fit in anywhere that uses 'main' over 'master' because it's disrespectful to the Old Ones.
Thank Cthulhu, Kurtis just wrapped up a slackbot to help us remember to use the correct words when speaking with each other."
Millions must be hooked .
After the first two vignettes I was going to write, "Cthulhu would be proud" but then I saw you were going explicitly down that path.
Anyhow, it hits a nerve today because I have, just today, become aware of a potential missed objective related to, shall we say, my corporate duty to the Old Ones. This can likely be rectified by investing about 4 hours to watch/read Thalassian-themed videos and articles, which will suffice if there really are no more seats available in the popular course on Checking Ones Humanist Biases.
Meanwhile, not a single Thalassian works at the company.
~
"How are we ever going to attract that kind of talent with you using this sort of language in the workplace?
I knew a heavily-oceanated person that just finished in the top half of their coding boot camp. When I asked where they were looking and whether they'd consider us, they said no way they'd fit in anywhere that uses 'main' over 'master' because it's disrespectful to the Old Ones.
Thank Cthulhu, Kurtis just wrapped up a slackbot to help us remember to use the correct words when speaking with each other."
Woke corporate District 9
So hard to find good Shoggoths these days.
Your days are numbered, the color will come back for you in your dreams lol